Vampires – the sissiest of all monsters

Of all the classic monsters I’ve known in my past, vampires rank near the bottom of my list of favorites. To be honest, I was never really a fan of the blood suckers. They always came across as bland and rather uninspired to me in most forms. Don’t get me wrong, there were a few marvelous vampires created, but for the most part I didn’t care for them. They just don’t frighten me. That’s the problem. Monsters are supposed to be scary, which is flat out something most vampires just aren’t. I don’t want read about a creature that leaves two puncture holes in a physically drained victim’s neck. Boring! Where’s the excitement? Where’s the carnage? Where’s the fun?

I want a bit more from my vampires. I want a beast that isn’t more into seducing women than terrorizing its unfortunate victims. There isn’t anything wrong with a bit of carnal desire, but during an attack is not an appropriate time for it. I want a creature that will tear the limbs from men and enjoy them as though they were turkey legs at a county fair. I want a blood thirsty savage kind of vampire.

You may be thinking now would be a good time to bash the Twilight series, but I’m not going to do that. I’m not even going to bash Blade for being a “good” vampire. Sparkly weirdos and good guy vamps have their place, but that place isn’t in my stories. I’m not saying I’ll never incorporate those types of characters, but for the foreseeable future look forward to not finding that sort of thing in my writing. I may be getting older, but I haven’t gone soft just yet.

What are your thoughts about the creatures of the night?

3 responses to “Vampires – the sissiest of all monsters

  • littlewonder2

    Okay, to be honest, I like vampires. But I agree, they need to be more savage, more scary.

    But that’s the thing; the key word here is ‘vampire’, it’s ‘modern’. As in, “Modern vampires bite the big one, whereas more classic vampires (like Lestat de Lioncourt, for example) bash modern ass.”

    I mean, come on. What kind of pathetic whipped-ass wuss has to be invited into a human’s home by said human? Writers today empathise too much with vampires, trying to make them citizens like us. Hell with them! My vampires would rather rip out their necks!

    • Adam Ickes

      That was my intention in writing this post. I was referring to modern vampires, I just left out the word, which was probably an oversight on my part, but you got the gist of what I was going for. I’m glad I’m not the only one who likes my vampires to be cold hearted, ruthless killing machines.

      • littlewonder2

        😀 Indeed. In fact, if the common dislike of Twilight’s anything to go by, I’d say it could even be common.

        (Tha again, nobody ever says anything about Vampire Diaries, and that’s FAR worse than Twilight’ll ever be!)

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