It’s story time again, Friday Fictioneers style. That means one hundred words of Winger. I hope you all enjoy this latest installment.
Thanks as always to Madison for hosting and the rest of you for reading.
Comment, criticism, and half drunken rants are encouraged.
Copyright Rochelle Wisoff Fields
Previous Installments: Part 1 | Part 2
Starting Point (The Winger Chronicles: Part 3)
Her outstretched finger guided his gaze to the gargantuan cavern nestled at the base of a mountain across the lush, green field. “That’s where we’re going, right?”
The toothless grin in the side of the mountain beckoned. “That’s where our journey begins. Where it ends, I don’t know.”
Silence swirled around them, encasing them in an unfriendly cocoon. Even the grass beneath their feet hungrily swallowed the sounds of their footfalls as they crossed the vast expanse. He stopped twenty yards shy of the massive entrance, unable to shake the feeling of being a fly trapped in a spider’s web.
—–
Read the ramblings of my cronies:
Adam Ickes 
September 14th, 2012 at 4:34 AM
so full of suspense…..
September 16th, 2012 at 9:54 PM
Thanks. I try.
September 14th, 2012 at 9:29 AM
100 words is not enough, give us more, give us more!! I await each new sliver of Winger’s story with baited breath.
September 16th, 2012 at 9:55 PM
I too await the next sliver of Winger’s journey. It’s difficult not knowing what the next prompt will be. Hard to know where to take the story when I have to wait for the inspiration.
September 14th, 2012 at 10:04 AM
I love the toothless grin of the mountain, and the cocoon of silence. Very vivid imagery. More installments to come I hope?
September 16th, 2012 at 9:56 PM
The way it’s shaping up, there is going to be a lot more Winger before he makes it to the end of his journey.
September 14th, 2012 at 10:52 AM
…the grass hungrily swallowed the sounds of their footfalls. Nice.
September 16th, 2012 at 9:57 PM
Thanks, Rochelle.
September 14th, 2012 at 11:07 AM
Cue ominous music… very visual language, and the weaving in of the prompt was creepily well done.
September 16th, 2012 at 9:58 PM
Thanks, Kathy. I appreciate the kind words.
September 14th, 2012 at 11:22 AM
And again you leave us wanting more! I like the subtle allusion to the prompt, whereas most of the rest of just blundered on, literally. Nice piece.
Here’s mine: http://unexpectedpaths.com/friday-fictioneers/tangled-webs/
September 16th, 2012 at 9:59 PM
That’s how I do. At least, that’s how I try to do. Need to keep the readers wanting more so they keep coming back.
September 14th, 2012 at 12:35 PM
Very well done. I like the understated writing which to my mind, enhances the upcoming unknown horror and builds anticipation. I like how the grass swallowed the sound of their footsteps (and hungrily at that), which is a lovely way of describing it. Gosh, for a hockey player (you know, those dumb jocks, of which I’m also one), you’re really erudite! 🙂
September 16th, 2012 at 10:01 PM
Haha, thanks.
September 14th, 2012 at 12:51 PM
Hi Adam,
I think the idea of a serialized story would be really interesting. This segment is very well written and creates the anticipation of more. Ron
September 16th, 2012 at 10:02 PM
Thanks, Ron. It’s a lot of fun, but the 100 word limit can be a real bear. So much to say and so few words to say it with.
September 14th, 2012 at 2:27 PM
Hey Adam, I like the way this story is going. I love a story with a journey. I’m sure you’ll have dangers galore in it. I’m 29 on the list I think.
September 16th, 2012 at 10:04 PM
Thanks, Atiya. I’m a sucker for a story with a journey too. Hopefully this turns out to be a worthy journey.
September 14th, 2012 at 6:34 PM
Clearly the beginning of something dangerous. In the story, I mean. Although the concept of serializing a story into 100-word pieces could be treacherous, too. You’re off to a good start. I’m very interested in seeing how it turns out.
September 16th, 2012 at 10:05 PM
yeah, I’m thinking there are going to be A LOT of segments to this story. It feels like a tale that can’t be told quickly, but I have no idea where the next part will take Winger, so I could be wrong. For all I know, he could die next week.
September 14th, 2012 at 8:56 PM
I was invested. My favorite line… Even the grass beneath their feet hungrily swallowed the sounds of their footfalls.
September 16th, 2012 at 10:07 PM
I hope I can keep you invested for weeks to come. Glad you enjoyed it.
September 15th, 2012 at 11:18 PM
well done, sir. thanks for using the suggestion instead of the concrete.
September 16th, 2012 at 10:09 PM
Thanks, Rich. I almost went the giant spider in the cave route, then thought better of it. It seemed almost too obvious an approach to make it past the point of just being an idea.
September 17th, 2012 at 9:53 AM
I liked it and was particularly enjoying the idea of being encased in a cocoon of silence.
September 18th, 2012 at 6:18 AM
Dear Adam,
A long journey in the dark. looking forward to it.
Aloha,
Doug
September 19th, 2012 at 6:27 AM
Hope he brought a flashlight, but somehow I don’t think he did.
September 21st, 2012 at 7:52 AM
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