The Eloko of Zaire

An extraordinarily evil race of beings dwells in the deepest, darkest part of the rain forests in central Zaire. The eloko is a dwarf-like creature with a short temper, a penchant for violence, and a taste for human flesh–especially that of the female variety. It is said that these creatures (the plural of eloko is biloko by the way) are said to be the spirits of the ancestors of the people who live there. Apparently they harbor some sort of grudge against the living and are known to be a rather vicious, unforgiving lot.

Deep within the heavy trees they guard their treasures–rare fruits and the game of the forest–from all who dare trespass.

They aren’t much in the looks department. These odd little fellows have a tendency to grow grass instead of hair and have a snout like a crocodile, said to be able to open wide enough to swallow a human. As if that weren’t bad enough, add piercing eyes and sharp claws to the mix and you’ve got yourself an Eloko.

On a related note: if you happen to find yourself in a Central African forest and hear a bell, just turn the other way and run. Don’t look back. Don’t wait around to see what’s making the odd ringing where there shouldn’t be any. Biloko are said to possess little bells that can cast spells on passers-by. You don’t want that. Trust me.

Also, just to reiterate, if you are a female, you might want to consider not venturing into the forest at all. I did mention they prefer the taste of female flesh over that of males, didn’t I? Don’t say I didn’t warn you if you find yourself on a Eloko’s menu some day.

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Creature Feature: The Rake

There is a creature who exists in many legends. A creature that has terrified countless people in their own homes (and outside them as well). A creature that has a penchant for crouching. As far as I can tell, this creature knows no bounds and can be found worldwide.

The always crouching hominid known as the Rake has limbs jutting out at awkward angles and a shrill high-pitched voice that witnesses say is indescribable.

It is said that this creature moves around on all fours like a dog and lies in wait for victims to pass by in the night–it’s only ever seen at night. The beast is said to make demands that must be met or it will haunt and pester it’s victim relentlessly, sometimes even to the point of death.

One of the major curiosities involving this cryptid is the fact that a lot of information on it was uploaded to the internet in 2003. Then rather quickly all of that information was deleted. There one day, gone the next. No one has fessed up to removing the information so its disappearance is a mystery.

I leave you with a journal entry from a mariner’s log in 1691:

“He came to me in my sleep. From the foot of my bed I felt a sensation. He took everything. We must return to England. We shall not return here again at the request of the Rake.”

Behold my amazing sketch, and weep at its beauty!

Creature Feature: Ya-Te-Veo

There is a monster that purportedly exists on every single continent on this magnificent planet of ours. This creature is not like other creatures, for this creature is a tree. Yes, a tree. However, to say this is a terrifying, horrid tree would not be an overstatement– may in fact be an understatement.

This devourer of flesh is said to have its origins in the depths of the oddity that is Madagascar. Its spores then traveled the world, carried by the missionaries that visited the strange island.

This monster has the ability to live in any environment. Anywhere a tree can grow, the Ya-Te-Veo can grow alongside. Any forest, any jungle, any city park: they’re all possible stomping grounds for this patient beast. It doesn’t matter where you are. If there are trees nearby, the unnerving potential that this thing is close by is higher than I’d like to imagine.

With well hidden, camouflaged eyes it watches and waits until you’re too close to escape, and then it grabs you with its tentacle-like branches. It crushes your bones and entombs you within a barken prison. It opens its mouth, lined with razor sharp teeth. It tears you limb from limb and devours you like the rare delicacy that you are. And then, it goes back to waiting for another foolish enough to venture too close.

The rough English translation of this man eating plant’s name Ya-Te-Veo: “I see you.”

If you find yourself in the unfortunate predicament of being snagged by one of these creatures most foul, you will not escape, so don’t bother praying for that. Instead pray that you’ve been snagged by an adult Ya-Te-Veo rather than a juvenile. Your death will be faster, and likely far less painful. The younger ones don’t quite have the strength to kill you quickly.

You’d do best to just keep your distance from trees in general, just to be sure.

A primative drawing to say the least, but in my defense: it’s pretty difficult to make a tree interesting when you’ve only given yourself 5 to 10 minutes to do a quick drawing.

Creature Feature: Emela-ntouka

Imagine, if you will, that you’re trekking through the swamps of the Congo. Now let’s go a step further and picture yourself hacking through the undergrowth with your trusty machete. You burst through the thick vegetation and find yourself behind a brownish-gray beast as large as an elephant with short, stumpy legs, but the tail is wrong. Elephants don’t have thick, heavy tails that drag on the ground. This thing does. When it swivels its head to give you a snort you immediately notice that the face is wrong too. What you’re seeing isn’t the face of an elephant, but something more reminiscent of a rhinoceros, complete with one long horn at the tip of its snout.

The animal you’ve just encountered has many names, but the one we’ll go with is the Emela-ntouka and you’ll be lucky to get away with your life. It’s name means “elephant killer”, which it purportedly does. It’s known to be a ferocious beast that will kill anything in its path. It is said that the pygmies fear this creature more than any other dangerous animal.

Part dinosaur, part hippopotamus, part elephant, part rhinoceros. Think of a semi-aquatic triceratops without the crest and only one horn and you’ll have a pretty accurate depiction of this giant most foul.

The creature’s horn is a subject of major debate. It the horn is ivory, then technically it isn’t a horn at all. It’s a tusk. If the horn is bone then the creature is likely reptilian. However, the horn could also be made of keratin. Without a sample to study, classifying this thing is impossible. In reality though, does classifying it actually matter? In a way yes, but not in the grand scheme of “keep that horrid monster away from me” things.

Creature Feature: The wonderfully weird alux

Let’s add a bit of hijinks to this little weekly party, shall we?

This week I’ll be exploring the cryptid known as the alux, the plural of which is aluxob. These little tricksters live south of the border in Central America.

The aluxob are very small creatures, basically tiny humans that stand only about knee-high. Legend says that they are invisible but can take on physical form, usually to frighten humans or to congregate, but it could be for any number or reasons. When seen, they are usually dressed in traditional Mayan garb.

These beings are known for their tricks. They’re basically the Mexican version of leprechauns. Though they have that reputation, the aluxob don’t start out as tricksters.

The story goes that an alux is birthed when a farmer builds a tiny house on his property, usually in a corn field. The alux is bound in servitude to the farmer for seven years. It helps the crops grow, summons rain, and scares away animals and other intruders that would harm the harvest.

When the seven years comes to an end, it is of utmost importance that the farmer go to the tiny house and close all windows and doors to seal the alux inside.  Should the farmer fail to do so, the alux will run wild and become the prankster of legend.

There is a belief that on occasion an alux will approach a farmer and demand an offering. If the farmer denies the alux, he is bringing misfortune upon himself and his family. If he bends over backward for the creature, he will be protected and good luck will rain down upon him.

Also, if you haven’t spoken the name yet, don’t. There is a belief that to name them out loud is not a good thing. Doing so will summon an alux from its home to wreak havoc on your life. Sorry, guess I should have started with that. If one shows up at your door, do whatever it asks of you.